Danger Boy Turns 15!

Fifteen years ago today a very complicated boy was born. When you have a child who is difficult spirited, and you read everything there is to know about difficult spirited children, you will hear again and again that their births are very different from that of the other children in the family. I think you'll all most of you will understand what I'm talking about when I say, "from 2 centimeters to delivery in 1 hour." 'Nuff said?

Danger Boy was rolling over by 5 weeks, crawling at 4 months, getting himself to a sitting position at 5 months, walking the day he turned 8 months, and running at 8 months 1 day. He had his first stitches at 8 + 1/2 months.

  In this picture, from his aunt & uncle's wedding, his brother is holding on to him to prevent him from running away.

DB loved water from his very first bath. Remember the swimming baby in the movie Endless Love?

DB started jumping off the high dive at our swim club when he was 2. It seemed like a good idea at the time; now I wonder what the hell I was thinking letting him do that. Maybe I just liked to see the panic in the eyes of the other moms when he started up the ladder (I do have a teeny-weeny sadistic streak). The lifeguards all knew and loved DB;  he was sort of their mascot.

DB has always loved animals, and they have always loved him. My mom had a Brittany Spaniel named Amy. She and DB spent so much time tongue-kissing that DB thought his real name was Amy! Luke! Stop!

Since Tourette Syndrome, and neurological difficulties in filtering noise, have really shaped who DB is, I have to talk a little bit about it. DB is (in my humble opinion) seriously handsome. He is also a gifted athlete, and  smart. Remember those boys in high school that just knew they were all that and a bag of potato chips too? When DB was little I worried that might be him--everything came so easily to him. Then, two weeks before kindergarten started, came explosive-onset Tourette Syndrome (probably PANDAS). We didn't know it was TS for almost 5 years, because stuttering was his vocal tic, and the speech therapist thought his tics were secondary symptoms related to that (long story, different post).

In addition to the difficulties that TS brings, I think it also brought some positives. DB is very empathetic and kind. He is learning, and has learned, that he must know himself, and be able to recognize when he needs to give himself a break. I'm very proud of the fact that even though TS can make it very difficult to control your temper, he has never gotten in any trouble at school. He may fall apart the minute he walks in the door, but  that's what home is for sometimes.

One of Danger Boy's hidden talents is his writing. Well, his families and his teachers know, but it's not really a "guy" thing to go on about. When he was in fourth-grade he wrote a story that included this line, in a sci-fi story, "Acids plume from newborn mouths." I have yet to write a line that good. DB actually had a blog before I did. You know how you don't want to tell your kids what to be when they grow up, but you really, really hope they'll be X? Yeah, it's like that.

DB played a lot of sports in his day, and one thing everyone that has ever seen him play anything has said is that "he is a true competitor." Well, when he was slide-tackling in soccer when he was 5 years old some of the other moms said things like "WTF?" And when he knocked down the 2nd baseman in coach pitch and said, "What? I was breaking up the double-play?" there may have been some moms who thought he might be a bit too competitive. But the coaches all loved him!

His sport today is water polo, and it truly is his sport (okay, his and his older brother's). You don't play water polo if you don't want to mix it up a little, so DB and WP are a perfect fit. He's played on two Junior Olympic teams, and was captain of the novice team for his high school this year. He also played J.V., in all the Varsity tournaments, and on the C.I. F. team. He may not have the biggest body in the pool, but he's got the biggest heart.

 

DB had a rough beginning to his freshman year of high school. In true DB style, he worked out the kinks and is using his considerable skills of self-discipline to make sure his counselor looks at his second semester report card and does a double-take while rubbing his eyes in disbelief.

Happy Birthday, Danger Boy!

You always keep us on our toes. We're so proud of your thoughtfulness, your perseverance, and your wacky and wonderful mind.

 

 

P.S. You've heard the sayings about a boy and his dogs? This is the boy and these are his dogs.

Comments

[jozet at Halushki]

Happy Birthday, Danger Boy!

What a beautiful write-up about your beautiful guy. What a wonderful and blessed family you have.

I love this post. You need to show this to him someday. We all most of us know that our mom's just adore us, but to have it written out in words - to know that they really "see" us...what a gift to a child. Beautiful, you. :-)

[jozet at Halushki]

Happy Birthday, Danger Boy!

What a beautiful write-up about your beautiful guy. What a wonderful and blessed family you have.

I love this post. You need to show this to him someday. We all most of us know that our mom's just adore us, but to have it written out in words - to know that they really "see" us...what a gift to a child. Beautiful, you. :-)

[LifeAsIKnowIt]

Happy Birthday, Danger Boy!

[Don Mills Diva]

What a sweet post about your spirited boy! Happy birthday to him.

[Smalltown Mom]

Happy Birthday to a great kid!

[debbie]

Danger Boy sounds like such a great kid...and wow! he doesn't look like you at all, does he?!?! :-D
Have a wonderful birthday!!!
"otanjyo bi, omedeto gozaimasu"!!
(in Japanese, "happy birthday"...putting some international flair into his day!!!)

[The Mom Bomb]

Handsome and empathetic: you've got a rare one!

Great kid, and so good to hear how he's met his challenges with such spirit and determination. I've got a couple "spirited" kids of my own, so I always feel encouraged by posts like these.

[Angie]

I love this. Great tribute to your son who obviously brings you great varying emotions. Happy Birthday to Danger Boy. Thanks for giving me a glimpse into the future of my nearly 5 year old.

KEEP BELIEVING

[Tootsie Farklepants]

This is awesome!! Happy Birthday DB!!!

[MamaBird]

What a great ode! Happiest of Birthdays. And I agree, home is for falling apart (kids) and catching the pieces and building up (moms).

[kcinnova]

Happy Birthday, DB!

Empathy is a tremendous gift.
My own 15yo also has a big heart and has had his share of challenges. Not the same as yours--to begin with, 39 hours of labor--and the docs have different words and acronymns to describe him. It does seem that the ones who give us the greatest challenges also seem to have the strongest grasps on our emotions.

[CircusKelli]

A very lovely tribute!

Happy Birthday Danger Boy! :)

[Manic Mommy]

You may be biased but I'm not: boy is he a handsome kid. Adversity makes him stronger and more well-rounded.

Your comment that sometimes home is for falling apart is right on target. We're the soft landing.

Happy Birthday to Danger Boy and Mom.

(2 cm to 10 in 45 mins, then an emergency c-section - oy.)

[Suzy]

TS is a small price to pay for having that kind of heart and spirit. Beautiful post.

[Suzanne]

What a wonderful boy you have.
He has overcome alot and will be a great father/husband because of his great upbringing.
You have every right to be proud.
Happy day to all of you!

[HRH]

Happy Birthday. What an amazing boy. I love that he was jumping off the diving board at 2 and I love that you let him.

[Laura/centerdownmom]

Hi Jenn -- (Something interrupts me everytime I visit your blog. I am determined to finish this comment.)

I just love your post. My hair stands up on end when I read or hear about a parent who sees their child for Who He Is, and loves and honors that. It is a gift to the child. It will always center him. :)

I have a 15yo boy as well. Wish we lived close by. And Happy Birthday to Danger Boy!

[Madmad]

I bopped over because every time I was leaving a comment today, I found you'd already said exactly what I wanted to say, so I came over to share the giggle, but loved this post so much I wanted to say that, too. Also? Can you believe you have a 15 year old? We should all look so good!

[Kellan]

Happy Birthday DB!!! What a sweet post about your special boy - he sounds like a great person and a wonderful son - you should be very proud, as I know you are!! I hope he had a great day!!

See you soon. Kellan

[Anastasia Beaverhausen]

Happy Birthday to a seriously handsome guy who has SO MUCH going for him. I hope this year brings new triumphs for DB!

[Cheri]

Happy Birthday DB! Spirited kids are the BEST!

[Hilary]

Aww that was just lovely. What a sweet birthday gift to make for your son. He's a sweetie.. and comes by it honestly.

[Domestically Challenged]

Happy Birthday Danger Boy...

and happy birth day to you Jen...
What an amazing, positive Mother you are - he is a very lucky boy.

[Mrs. G.]

Happy Birthday Danger Boy! He is a handsome boy. And the pictures with the dogs? Fogeddaboutit.

[Reluctant Blogger]

Awww lovely post. Sorry am I rather late in wishing him happy birthday. But then he doesn't know me anyway!!!!

I love reading about Danger Boy. It is the only time I get to feel that my oldest son is not too reckless. Danger Boy is about the only child I have ever heard of who is more reckless than my Harry.

I love the way you write about your family - you make them seem so real.

[kate]

happy birthday toooo yooouuuu (danger boy).

[anne]

Jenn, I always enjoy your comments on Hollywood: Where Hot Comes to Die so I checked out your blog. I have a son who is 18 who is "normal" healthwise, for the most part, but he sounds so much like your DB. He does not have Tourettes' although his father does (well only my opinion) ..but he did have quite a ferocious temper when he was little. Anyway, enjoy your posts. We have some things in common (my 18 year old will be going away to college next year and he is my last chickee to fly the nest).

[JCK]

Your post made me cry...Beautiful, Jenn. And you are an AMAZING and wonderful mom. I wish we could sit down and have tea together or maybe some hard stuff. We'll have to make that happen since we're only a couple of hours away!

[ms. changes pants while driving]

hahaa... i love that... "if you can't play nice, play water polo."

i went to high school in coronado and that TOWN is ALL about water polo.

[JCK]

I see why stories of my BOY remind you of yours. :)

[Air Jordans]

The man who has made up his mind to win will never say "impossible".

[mkzkikp]

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