« Generation Gap | Main | Are They Trying To Tell Me Something? »

June 09, 2008


Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

Tootsie Farklepants

I remember my knees hurt when I sprouted up to 5'8" in 6th grade.

I agree with your dress code rules.

Kalynne Pudner

For the family wedding we attended this weekend, 16-yo Beastie had borrowed one of my too-small dresses (because she "doesn't have any clothes," as my blog explained). I'd forgotten this dress shows a good bit of cleavage. It also showed Beastie's clashing bra straps, which did distress her (there's teenage modesty for ya: cleavage, YES, bra straps, NO). So I gave her a different dress I'd just bought, which covered the straps perfectly and looked adorable on her. At least, I thought so. She was horrified: "This dress makes me look flat!"

Her envelope has fallen off the table.


maybe sometimes it is easier to raise pets than growing children? I actually, um, posted on that this morning


I agree with you on all points in the dress code. I have not had a problem w/ sporty girl yet...she is still kind of on the tom boy side...but she is filling out her t-shirts and jeans a little too cute for my taste now.
The girls look great though. Love the outfits....we still have some of those socks here too!

manager mom

Cleavage is for cougars. Very sound advice. I will be bookmarking this post for 7 or 8 years, and showing it to The Girl when we get to a certain age...

standing still

Fantastic rule. Fantastic post. I agree completely. I will be sending this to everyone I know who has a teen girl.


As I have only boys, I can only imagine these kind of things...but I think that you are handling it all perfectly...I'm still taking notes, though!!!
My goodness...those socks!!! Talk about a 'blast from the past'!!! Great picture...they looked so cute (is it still okay to say "cute"?!? I feel so old!!)


Just talking to someone about this the other day. When we were in high school - we remember looking like...well...just "girls". Just normal young girls. Now, girls are made to look sexy...and I mean "sexy", a la media idols. It just seems so over the top and such an unnatural progression in development. Love your guide. Actually, it pretty much applies for adult babes too, don't you think? As in, for example, if you're going to wear some CFM shoes, you probably don't want to show off the "girls" too much, bc it's all about the shoes. Show off ONE thing, downplay the other. :)

Smalltown Mom

Good rules, cute picture!

I have two boys. It's different. They mostly wear black. Our rules: no rude comments on t-shirts, no visible boxers.


Great dress code advice - my 11-going-on-23 and I have been tussling over this lately. Fortunately, her father took her out Sunday to get some appropriate clothing that fit her (man, they grow so fast), so I'm confident things will go smoother for a while. I will definitely chime in with these guidelines though (especially as my 9 year old is gravitating more to the "sass" side of fashion.

Mike Golch

interesting post,I'm glad that I did not have children especially a girl shed would have been under lock and key until so was of legal age.That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Jen on the Edge

Excellent post and I couldn't agree with your clothing rules more.


I love your dress rules and thank God everyday for boys...just boys.


These are great rules. I will have to use them on my 6-year-old. She thinks she has to keep up with my 19-year-old.


I like your rules...I wish more Moms followed them :-)


That attire thing is so tricky. You want them to dress respectfully and at the same time fashionably and it's hard to find where the two meet. I really like your fashion rules. I hope I remember them for my daughter.


Those are some GREAT rules and CUTE girls! (And the shirts rock! The socks? EEEEK!!)
Sadly, fashion does not often agree with parental rules or school rules. (Most places we have been have a school rule on skirts/shorts: fingertip length or longer.)
All of this makes me glad that I have sons. Because when I see those cute girls? I think about how difficult it is to be the one navigating them through these confusing teenage years!
Congratulations on being a good navigator, and thank you for sharing your wisdom! :)


The rule at our house, was the hands are your side trick, your dress and shorts had to be longer that the tips of your fingers when your hands are at your side.

It is much easier with boys, except the whole boxers showing above your jeans. Why can't kids pull up their pants!


What CUTE outifts! My daughter and her friends (13 and 14) are BIG on the camisole under T-shirt thing- thank goodness!


I love your rules! My daughter only likes to wear comfy clothes like T's and soft pants or shorts. She hates if her belly even shows when she lifts her arms. I was always into fashion growing up and loved to travel to NYC and shop at Macy's where my uncle worked(and had a 25% off discount). The outfits you made are great.
I am soooo suprised I won the book! Thanks


She looks darling!

My daughter, while only 4, has such a CLEAR idea of what she wants to wear... it sort of freaks me out because the boys? I can still put clothes on their bed and they're good to go..

Manic Mommy

We have friends with two girls to our two boys. Upon the birth of his first daughter, he imparted the following wisdom:

With boys, you worry about one penis; with girls, you worry about alllll the other penises.


I have soon to be 'tweens, and I LOVE these rules. Perfectly put :)


Love your rules! I may have to adopt them. EGirl's dressed herself since she was 2. LOVE the 10 month old grabbing for the color coordinated shoes!

Little Miss Sunshine State

We had a rule called "If Brittany Spears would wear it, YOU CAN'T"
And I also sent her to a Catholic Middle School. Those uniforms were EXTREMELY unsexy.

My daughter was pretty modest...no cleavage, no heels and no belly. Then she went to University of Tropical Paradise and it's all boobage-all the time.


cute socks.


if i had a girl, and i don't, i would use the same rules. in fact, i sort of do for myself. it's ok to wear a mini, stiletto heals, or low cut blouse. but NOT all at once!!! good job mom.


Oh my. I have sons and I bless you and thank you for said rules. I cannot imagine life as a teenaged boy in the midst of so much exposed flesh. I know male teachers who have great discomfort. Dressing appropriately is GOOD MANNERS! Well said, as always, Jenn!


Thanks for the input! And thanks for mentioning the dads/brothers thing. One commenter over at MCMM thought it was weird that the "crux of the issue is [the] father." I didn't know how to take that comment, you know? I mean, shouldn't the dad approve of what she is wearing? He knows better than I how boys/men look at her.

I think I was looking for an easy answer, whereas you are telling me what I was realizing myself: different situations call for different rules, and you just have to call them as you see them. Is that right?

My little Susie is a shoe girl. If I bring her into Payless Shoes, her whole body starts quivering like an excited puppy. It is the funniest thing I have ever seen.


All - good guidelines! Cute girls!

Hope you had a good day - Kellan


Sounds like you have some terrific guidelines there. She looks like a beautiful, sweet girl. I love that outfit:)
I think I may have trouble with my girly, she is shoe obsessed too. She has these little wedge healed, pink polkadot espadrilles that she wants to wear out to play and to bed. yikes.


I love those rules... i'm going to have print them out and save them. i am going ot have two little teenie boppers!! ugh. i worry so much b/c girls aren't even waiting till they are teenagers to start dressing racier, and honestly it seems as if some parents just let this go and pass it off as nothing major.

i wss some what of a wild child teenager, so i feel like it gives me the upper hang, but i also feel like maybe i'm in for a little taste of my own medicine... ugh!!

grant me strength and please forgive me.
that is all i have to say... for now.

and your daughter is lovely!!



This is a fantastic post and I applaud your rules. And now, with your permission, I'll just copy them and post them as "Super Teenage Dress Tips from Juggling Jen" for a few years (hopefully!) down the road.


Tell SB that she can have access to my shoe closet(s) whenever she's in LA. She's obviously a GENIUS!!

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!

That is one beautiful girl you have there Jenn (surrounded by two other lovely girls, of course).


Jen, this made me happy once again that I am the father of a boy. Only one child and he be a male.
Enjoyed this though!


I agree with Cheri - she is beautiful. Funny (but true) post!

Reluctant Blogger

Gosh what a lot of comments! Got repetitive strain injury there trying to scroll to the bottom - serves me right for being so late on the scene I guess.

Your rules sound fair. Not that I would have followed them - my sister and I used to sneak our "real clothes" out in our bags and change on the top deck of the bus on the way to town.

My daughter was fine re clothes (or maybe she snook out and changed on the bus too!?) mostly wore black and not too plunging generally.

My sons will only will camouflage trousers - at least they don't show the dirt!

Just Jamie

Adore your rules. I'm printing them out for Tatum's future.

Jennifer H

Great rules. And SB grew 5 inches in a year? Wow.

Nora Bee

Rules are good. Go you.

phd in yogurtry;n

I love your "no sexy" rule, your high heel rule and no cleavage, definately. I am willing my memory bank to hang onto these. My time is coming soon enough. I'm ok on some tummy showing, its one of those "know it when you see it" as you say. I have mixed feelings about brothers having say so. Dad, absolutely, he's the parent. We want dads having input. But brothers having veto power over sister's clothes? I guess I remember my older brother and how jealous he was of his friends paying the least bit of attention toward me. I was a t-shirt, jeans and tennis shoe kinda gal, too, so my clothing wasn't an issue. It was what was under the clothes.

Great post!


Those rules seem really familiar... Must be because I tried to break every one of them! But now that I'm a parent, they make much more sense!

When are girls' clothes going to start looking more like clothes again and not leftover scraps of fabric?

The comments to this entry are closed.

My Photo

A Cause that is Near and Dear to my Heart

  • A Cause that is Near and Dear to my Heart--Please click!

email and flickr

Cast of Characters

  • Danger Boy
    20 years old, plays water polo for Gannon University in Erie, PA. He's the strong, silent type. Studying PoliSci.
  • Grown-up Girl
    Dr. GrownUp Girl is happily home after finishing pharmacy school in Chicago. Busy building a post-student life with Dr. GrownUp Guy.
  • GrownUp Guy
    GrownUp Girl's husband and a most-excellent son-in-law. Oh yeah, he's Dr. GrownUp Guy, PharmD.
  • Mr. Fix-it
    Husband and father extraordinaire. He is gone more than he is home, but all his frequent-flyer miles keep this big family connected.
  • MVP
    23 years old, graduate of Colorado State Fort Collins with a major in Wildlife Biology and a minor in sustainability. He lives in FoCo with his girlfriend, Mandy, and their dog Rosy.
  • Social Butterfly
    18 years old, attends Northern Arizona University, majoring in psychology. She's my snuggle bug.

Blog Designed by:

  • Photobucket


  • Google Analytics
Blog powered by Typepad

BOSSY'S No-Book Tour

  • I am on Bossy’s (No) Book Tour