In Which I Have To Set Some People Straight

Growing up and raising kids in San Diego means I've spent a lot of time at the beach. When the kids were young we went at least weekly during warm weather. Because I'm a "the more the merrier" person I usually had at least a couple of kids besides my own.

One particular beach outing stands out. It was early in the year for the beach--probably early April. It was too cold for swimming, but perfect for digging in the sand and not crowded at all. In fact when I got there with MVP, Danger Boy and 3 of their friends, we had the beach to ourselves. We set up camp near a lifeguard tower--still not open for the season. Unlike the tower in the picture though, the one we were at was situated atop a huge pile of sand.

Not too long after we got there a group of 3 women set up camp on the opposite side of the tower, Each woman was accompanied by a sweet little girl.

So, there was me and 5 boys ranging in age from 2 to 5 on one side and the 3 women and their daughters on the other side.

My boys proceeded to do what any group of blue-blooded boys would do given a pile of sand and a lifeguard tower. Climb the sand hill, scale up the railing on the tower, climb as high as they can get, and jump from the top. I mean, what else are you going to do? They were having a ball.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the tower, 3 little girls happily filled up their buckets with sand and then dumped them out, never moving off their towels. Their moms watched them and talked. About me. Well, not me per se, but the mom that was letting the boys behave in such a reckless and dangerous manner. The mom who should be teaching the boys how to behave instead of letting them climb and jump all over the place and holler while they were doing it.

I let them talk for a while. Then I thought I'd join in the conversation. I walked to their side of tower and said, "Hi, I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm Jenn and I'm the mother of those boys. I'm guessing that these little girls are your only children." Slack-jawed staring was my response. "You may not realize this, but boys and girls play very differently. What these boys are doing is normal--this is how boys play. And my hearing is normal too, so I've heard everything you've said. If you're going to talk trash about people, you might want to keep your voices down."

They didn't stay much longer.

Comments

[Grandy]

You truly are my hero. Really...trully...AWESOME!!! :)

[Stacie]

Zing! Good for you! That made me giggle. :)

[Susan]

You rock.

[Mary Alice]

Blahhahaaahaaaa.....that was BRILLIANT! You and I would have so much fun together. I have been busy this week setting people who have small children straight about teenagers and their parents. Guess what....no matter what book read, what parenting method you have employed....your children will grow up and make their own decisions. Just because the kid got a tatto does not mean he is now into the devil, it does not mean he is a bad person....and certainly does not mean his mother failed at parenting. It's the same thing elementary parents looking at teen parents...as mothers of girls watching mothers of boys.

[vodkamom]

you are the BEST. for sure.

[Professor J]

Oh, SNAP! You are awesome.

[kcinnova]

As a mother of 4 boys, I applaud you!

[Suzanne]

I love it!!! Good for you.
And YES, boys play SOOOOO differently than girls. (although my girls would have been jumping w/ your boys at that age)

[Jen on the Edge]

Dayum. You go, girl.

[Heidi]

Oh how I agree with you perfectly. Boys, and some girls, are wired to jump, run, scale, roll, build, and investigate everything. And to be loud doing it all.

Had a situation similiar where a mom of one girl had me thinking I was a horrible mom of two out of control boys. Good thing I realized I wasn't in the wrong, but her actions/words/inability to understand boys was the problem.

[jenrantsraves]

You would be so much fun to hang out with. Oh, the trouble we could get it, but I would finally have a partner in crime!

[Little Miss Sunshine State]

I have video of my son at age 2. The kid NEVER sat down and played quietly.
(I'm planning on making him watch those videos when he is here for the holidays)

What you did is SO much better than thinking it to yourself, all the way home from the beach!

[MamaMo]

Ah... whatever happened to that time-tested old addage, "If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all."? Bravo for standing up for yourself. Hopefully they learned the lesson.

[magpie]

Don't mess with Jenn!

[mrs. g.]

A nice little reminder that gossip and judgement don't pay! Busted.

[mrs. g.]

A nice little reminder that gossip and judgement don't pay! Busted.

[mrs. g.]

A nice little reminder that gossip and judgement don't pay! Busted.

[mrs. g.]

A nice little reminder that gossip and judgement don't pay! Busted.

[Memarie Lane]

good for you! it is amazing how people with only one child don't quite get the experience of having a larger family. and hloy cow are boys different! jessamine could sit and talk to her stuffed animals for hours, but max never stops moving and producing very loud sound effects.

[Lori]

Good for you! While I'm pretty assertive, I have a hard time telling it like it is to strangers. And seriously, I never understood it until I had a boy myself. They are just born with it!

[Lori]

Good for you! While I'm pretty assertive, I have a hard time telling it like it is to strangers. And seriously, I never understood it until I had a boy myself. They are just born with it!

[Alesia]

Good for you. Some people just expect kids to be little adults. They're not!

[Fannie]

Way to go! Also, thanks for sharing "Rethinking Christmas", brilliant!

[Fannie]

Way to go! Also, thanks for sharing "Rethinking Christmas", brilliant!

[Leslie]

My girl has never been a barbie playing, dress wearing girl. She would have run up to your boys and asked to play. I'm not sure I would have the guts to say anything to those snotty women, but I LOVE that you did. You rock!

[Suzy]

Didn't they realize that you had blue-blooded boys and NO ONE can mouth off to royalty?

[Melanie @ Mel, ADramatic Mommy]

Thank you for the reminder that passive aggressive sucks and the direct approach always works best.

[Don Mills Diva]

LOVE IT!

If everyone handled similar situations with as much logic, tact and class, the world would be a better place.

[Yo]

i LOVE it!

[Don Mills Diva]

Love it! If all confrontations were handed with such calm logic and tact the world would be a better place!

[Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING]

I have a crush on you.

KEEP BELIEVING

[Sam]

bwahahahaha!!! That was perfect!!! I BET they didn't say long!! They were scared of the scary Mum that lets her boys run amok!

[Green Girl]

You continue to rock.
I once asked a mom with VERY well behaved daughters what kind of drugs she gave them (to make the point that my boys were not abnormal).

How did your dress look? Fantastic? I bet it did.

[wenderina]

OK I admit it. As a non-parent I would have been doing 1 of 2 things. Moving my ass down the beach away from the ruckus or maybe talking a little trash...but at a very low volume. I don't like to mess with bad-ass mommies.

[CC]

I only WISH I had the guts that you do!

[Jason]

I need to take lessons from you.

[ms_teacher]

loved your story and as always you rock!

[JCK]

You know I ADORE you. Your kids are so lucky.

[Janet]

Hopefully they learned a few things that day!