Juggling Life

Going, going, going some more

I had busy weekend—mostly because I like to do everything and have a hard time missing anything.

Mr. Fix-it wanted me to join him in Las Vegas Saturday night for a work function. Because I love him slightly more than I hate Vegas*, I went. I couldn’t go Friday (which might have been more relaxing) because if I was going to be gone for the weekend I had to get the final project for this month’s master’s class done by Friday night (it was due Sunday).

I got everything for the project done except for the scanning of student work that needed to be inserted into my 62 page document (not quite as bad as it sounds—there were a lot of cover sheets) because my scanner refused to cooperate.

Anyway, Saturday morning I went to a Weight Watcher’s meeting (I’m happy to be back on the losing track), then to the airport, Mr. Fix-it and I caught a movie (no smoking in the movie theatre!) and then went to the party. There was a great DJ and though I don’t dance (unless somebody has plied me with a full bottle of Veuve Clicquot) I did enjoy watching the people that did—and there were a lot of really good dancers. I also sympathized with a kindred spirit who looked to be in actual physical pain as her friends tried repeatedly to pull her onto the dance floor.

Sunday morning meant back on a plane, off to my book group and then back home to get the papers that my husband had gone into the office and scanned for me inserted into the document. For dinner I made an old favorite that is not on the weight loss menu—spaghetti with oil and garlic—every once in a while you just need a big bowl of pasta.

Whew.

 

 

I have been thinking about my really visceral distaste for Vegas. It comes down to the smoking. Not only do I not like the physical aspects of smoking (the smell, etc.), I just think it really brings me down because of it is so intertwined with my mother and sister’s deaths from lung cancer.  I am so lucky that living in San Diego I can literally go months without seeing or smelling smoke—and Vegas is all about the smoking (well, the gambling and drinking, too, but you know what I mean).

Because I have to get this out in the open . . .

(Also, I have a piece over at Mrs. G’s)

Many of you mentioned Zumba in response to what you do for exercise. Yes, I’ve heard of it. I’m sure you have quite a good time doing it. I know several people, including my SIL, who love it.

I will never (and by that I mean never, ever, ever, ever, ever) try it.

Why, you ask?

I have no (and by that I mean zero to the infinity) rhythm whatsoever. Like in a totally embarrassing way. On Dance, Dance Revolution I can make it through a whole song without hitting it right once. True story.

It’s a handicap I tell you.

But you all enjoy your Zumba without me!

Reality Check?

As I make my rounds of the local middle and high schools—sometimes working in classrooms where the students have a variety of learning difficulties—I have been struck by the extreme gap by the level at which students are performing in school (a predictor of their future academic and economic success) and where they believe they will go in life.

It really hit while I was waiting for the school day to start (it happened to be at the high school I graduated from 29 years a few years ago) a couple of weeks ago. I always check out whatever student work is up on the walls. This classroom had posters based on “my past and my future.” Every single student was planning on going to college, buying a high-end car and living in a luxurious home. The writing that accompanied the magazine pictures was at the level of  of an elementary school student.

The I met the kids who had done these posters. They were a diverse bunch, from obviously learning-disabled to just really underachieving for no easily-discernable reason. Some were sweet, some were not, some were in-between. The work the teacher had left was grammar sheets that had the students identifying and inserting missing parts of simple sentences (7-8 words). You know the ones where you have to insert a period and capitalize? There was also a worksheet where you had to recognize homonyms.

Most of the kids gave it their best effort, and it was work for them.

These kids were 15 and 16 years old. They are not going to college—at least not in the traditional graduating with a bachelor’s degree sense. I am also doubtful that many of them will grow up to own BMWs and live in million-dollar homes. Yet they seem to think they will.

I see this same disconnect with regular-ed kids who are failing 4 of 6 classes and have Ds in the other two. Somehow, they believe, their dreams will mystically be fulfilled—although current evidence would point to the contrary.

It would seem to me that someone needs to be talking reality to these kids. Not in a dream-killing way, but in a “here are some plausible options” way. Is that a politically-incorrect opinion? It may be; I don’t know.

One the one hand, I really love this quote (a favorite of my mother’s) from Thoreau: “If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost, that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.” On the other hand, shouldn’t they be dreams for which you are capable of building the foundation?

Sunday, Windy Sunday

The wind started blowing in the wee hours of Sunday morning. It was a strong Santa Ana. I woke up several times due to the creaking of the wood frame of our home and the tree outside our bedroom window.

I had some drowsy thoughts about how loud a tornado must be—I knew that as hard as it was blowing it was nothing like the wind in a tornado or hurricane.

This is a photo of my friend’s house, and the tree from the adjacent park that fell on it while that wind was blowing. Luckily the parts of the house the tree fell on were unoccupied when it went down. When the tree hit the house they thought it was an earthquake.

Our suburb is really beautiful with all its mature trees, but when the wind comes up you do have to worry about one of those trees coming down.

Getting Serious (Again)

You may remember that my weight goal for the holiday season was just not to gain anything—I had lost 30 lbs. when I set that goal right before Thanksgiving. I did well except that for me the holiday season seems to mean until the last of the kids go back to college—which was last Monday—instead of January 2nd. (Let’s just say that MVP’s need to have roasted red pepper hummus and wheat thins on hand at all times made it very hard for me to get back on track with him home.)

I enjoyed my break from being vigilant about my eating and that I indulged in a sampling of all the (thousands of) tasty treats that passed through my kitchen and didn’t gain weight. I attribute that to reasonable, versus hog-wild, indulgence and being fairly active.

I have been making consistent use of the bike I got for Christmas, kayaking in nice weather and just making sure I get out and about. I think the fact that I’ve added some variety to what I do (instead of just walking all the time) is really helpful. The bicycling in particular is something I did a ton of when I was a kid—I wonder why I stopped. It’s also something Mr. Fix-it and I enjoy doing together. I’m starting to fantasize about one of those “bicycling through Italy” vacations.

I’m back in my weekly routine of roasting a bunch of vegetables to eat throughout the week and having my weekly indulgence on Saturday night. Weight Watcher’s new plan is so healthy; it really hasn’t been that big a change for me because I’m big on fruits and vegetables anyway, but I know from the meetings that a lot of people are making big changes in the foods they choose.

Speaking of WW, my Saturday morning group—which started with my friend Becky and I, has grown to include Jennifer, Susan, Sandra and Terri—we take up a whole row! A few months from now our book group will be one svelte bunch.

Just for fun (for me anyway, you might not care) I was mentally inventorying the fruits and veg I eat in a week (this is my minimum).

2 eggplants

1 spaghetti squash

2 zucchini

2 summer squash

1 lb. mushrooms

1 lb. cherry tomatoes

2 lg. onions

7 bananas

2 pineapples

7 oranges

3 apples

In addition to this list I make some dinner dishes, soups and casseroles and stir-fries, that are vegetable heavy and I’ll have salad with those. I’ve also discovered vegetarian fake meats—like “Meatless Ground” which give me lots of protein with very little fat—they’re good as ingredients in dishes that have other strong flavors.

How about you? Did you resolve to be healthier in 2011? Are you doing okay or are the dark winter months and freezing temperatures making you want to hibernate with a big dish full of homemade mac and cheese for sustenance?

In which I don’t party like it’s 1999 and yet feel a bit like I did . . .

Saturday night we had three couples over for dessert and game night (I’ve started doing dessert instead of dinner because . . . well, because it’s easier, so I’m more likely to do it—lame, I know). We had fun—the right amount of fun, not way too much fun. We stayed up later than usual, but not way too late. I even made sure I started the evening well-hydrated. I had several glasses of (really good) Champagne over about 4&1/2 hours—which is a lot, but not way too much.

On Sunday I wasn’t hungover, but damn was I dragging. Dragging as though I’d been an over-the-top party animal that was up half the night celebrating the end of a millineum. I would have happily been up for a Law and Order marathon, a carne asada burrito and a Big Gulp, but no—‘twas not to be.

What was to be?

Writing a 12 page academic paper.

Groan.

Next game night I’ll be doing my schoolwork the day before, instead of the day after. Also, I’m likely to remember that in 1999 I was 35—which turns out to be a lot younger than 46 when it comes to partying.

On the very bright side--you know you’ve married a good guy when you come downstairs the morning after a party to a sparkling kitchen, the dishwasher running, the folding chairs put away and all the bottles in the recycle bin.

How was your weekend?

The Final Confession . . .

Mrs. G and I both wanted Full Confessional Friday to survive the Women’s Colony, so I was happy to give it a home. However, in my heart (and probably yours) I always felt it worked best with Mrs. G at the helm. Now that she’s posting regularly at Derfwad Manor and has come up with the stunningly hysterical and spot on F*ck a D*ck Friday it’s time for me to bid Full Confessional Friday adieu. I’ll see you over at the Manor!

Feedback and Response: Continuing the Conversation

I’m continuing the conversation from last week by addressing some of the comments and feedback from people—some really good questions have been raised.

I like the theory except that for children who are reading already in Kindergarten (as my oldest was and my youngest at 4 is on the cusp!), what will they be doing while the others "catch up"? This is one of the biggest debates at our school, which is a relatively high SES. The parents of slower kids want the teachers to slow down. What that means for my son....BOREDOM.

Posted by: Michelle | January 13, 2011 at 01:07 AM

This is definitely a concern—and highlights the fact that the “achievement gap” is already in place before Kindergarten. That said, I think that as long as books, drawing supplies, paper and pencil and quality, developmentally appropriate toys are available the kids that are ready for reading and writing will continue to grow and advance. In a way I think what I envision is a little more of the Montessori model of the children choosing what they want to do. A bright reader will read and read and read and copy words and move on to writing sentences and stories using invented spelling because it is FUN for them.

I think that is what Head Start is for, and it is available to anyone who needs it. The kids in the Head Start program I taught at were thrilled to be read to, one on one, or otherwise. They were thrilled for any attention.
From what I've seen in high SES, asking those parents children NOT to be taught to read in kindergarten would be an outrage. I'm all for helping those in low SES, but not by "dumbing down" those in high SES. It is like the new mentality of never having a winner, or offering incentives, because "it promotes unnecessary competition". The real world is about competition. What is wrong with rewarding kids for doing good work, and making the others want to do better?

Posted by: Jenrantsraves | January 13, 2011 at 08:29 AM

Jen posted later about the realities of funding cuts to Head Start. In 2005 there were 21.4 million children ages 0-5 in the United States; approximately 18% of all children live in poverty. Head Start serviced 905,00 during that time. I am a product of Head Start—back in its earliest days, and a huge believer in the program (and others like it). The numbers do show we’re only helping a very small portion of the population that needs these programs.

As to “dumbing down,” I hear your point, but as you see from my response to the first comment I just don’t think you can really hold a bright kid back in Kindergarten. On the competition thing? Sing it, sister! I totally agree (and I’m going to post next week about older kids and realistic feedback).

Forgive me for saying so, I've spent a great deal of time in Kindergarten classrooms in the last 2-3 years and I don't see the "pressure" that is being described. Yes, the standards have been adjusted with the expectation that kids are reading by the end of the year. All but one child in my son's class reached that level of proficiency. Kids are capable of reading at this age (and earlier!). So instead of spending as much time having snack and a nap (which was part of my Kindergarten day), kids are spending more time on educational concepts. This wouldn't be such a detriment if kids played more on their own time. What's wrong with socialization and play time after school. In our district, Kindergarten is half-day which leaves plenty of time for little ones to explore their own interests, play with friends, etc. One of the main problems as I see it is that kids these days are scheduled so that this opportunity is eliminated. When you've got extracurricular activities that take up your after-school time at the age of 5, something is drastically wrong. Kids are wound too tight and under too much pressure not because the standards in Kindergarten have been altered, but because parents have set standards on their kids that can't be attained. My son, and others in his class, were all capable and learned to read by the end of the year. My son also came home and built with legos, read books of his choice, played outside with his friends, kicked a soccer ball with his Dad...you get the picture. We weren't spending that free time shuttling him from soccer to piano, to Kumon...

Something to think about.

Posted by: Michelle | January 17, 2011 at 12:14 AM

Michelle—I probably felt a lot like you do when my kids were young. That was before I got out there and spent some time in schools that were so completely unlike what I was used to. Believe me, the kids I’m talking about that are being pressured and turned off to reading by the regimen of Kindergarten are not the kids you’re seeing. And they’re not being shuttled from one activity to the next—they’re being plunked down in front of a TV under the care of an older sibling; and they’re not playing outside because it’s just not safe to be out in their neighborhood.

In an ideal world we’d be addressing the underlying social problems, but I’m just bouncing around ideas that might be things that could actually be implemented in today’s economic and political climate.

I’m loving the conversation and all the ideas—give me more!

Then and Now

                 I adore this picture—circa early 1994

             A blink of the eye (aka 17 years) later.

 

* I was originally denied permission to post the second picture on my blog, but Danger Boy and I negotiated a deal. A blogger’s got to do what a blogger’s got to do.

What’s Up . . .

MVP headed back to school Monday—so we’re down to just the four of us again; Mr. Fix-it, Danger Boy, Social Butterfly and me. I’ll have to get used to a little quieter house.

I’m working a 5-day sub job for a teacher friend. One of her classes is the one I use for my master’s work, so it will be nice to see them every day instead of just once a week. I’m doing a lesson connecting poetry and lyrics and we’re discussing and writing about teen issues. Fun, fun, fun!

I hate to do this to my snowbound friends, but we’ve had the most amazing few days here and I’ve taken full advantage of them by bicycling with my husband at Mission Bay and rock climbing with MVP (I clambered up the back side of the boulders while he free-climbed the fronts). There is something about a string of 80 degree, blue-sky days in January that really lifts the soul.

 

I didn’t quite get the angle right, but if I’d shot a little more to the right you’d be able to see the hills of Tijuana, Mexico in this shot. It would have been a sin to stay inside this weekend!

I am, once again, reminded of all the good things blogging has brought to me. Having friends all over the United States is an excellent thing. Music Man moved to Seattle this past weekend to start a new job. On Sunday night he was riding his bicycle and was hit by a car that never stopped. Another cyclist came to his aid and he’s fine (he was wearing a helmet) except for his crushed collarbone that needs to be surgically rebuilt with a plate and pins. I put out the call to some blogger friends in Seattle and pretty much instantly had the name of a top orthopedic surgeon. Thanks, Mrs. G. (and her nurse friend who had the inside scoop).

What’s the best thing blogging has brought you?